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I don’t mean to be coy.” With that, I felt like he had seated me in the waiting room of a horribly boring doctor’s office, never to call my name, but only to tease me with a tropical fish tank, outdated tabloids, and old love songs playing over the speakers. You know what I mean, if you’re on a first date …don’t pick out your wedding dress just yet. Communicate: With gentleness, inquire and clarify what a date means to him.Try this: “I enjoyed spending time with you and I have been wondering if you consider this a date?Your physical body is deeply connected to your spiritual and emotional self; hold onto that connection and don’t give it away just because someone buys you dinner.One thing's for sure: They can't stand "in-betweeners."So … We asked guys what a date really is, how they know if they're just "hanging out", and what they look forward to when it comes to spending time with someone they're interested in. Jake, 26, says he spends a lot of time arguing with himself over what's a date versus what's not a date.Before I got off of the phone with him I said, “Hold on. ” He explained, “Well, right now I’m dating this lady, but she’s only separated from her husband, so I want to see where it goes. His use of ambiguity put my heart in a vulnerable spot. Vague dates are an epidemic, but they can be stopped by honesty and clear boundaries.Maybe once that is done we could date, but for the sake of definition, yes, I guess we better call ourselves ‘just friends,’ though I know there’s undeniably chemistry between us. Here are a few tips to help you navigate the spaces between dates and “hangouts.” Be intentional: Be present in the moment and try not to project too far into the future. Take into account that you are worth taking the time to get to know, and so is he.
Of the 2,647 singles surveyed, ages 18-59, 69 percent are “at least somewhat confused about whether an outing with someone they’re interested in is a date or not.” A “one-on-one hangout,” after all, might be a date — 80 percent of respondents said they’d guess so — but it also might not be.Didn’t we just share about philosophy of relationships, creative projects, spirituality, and a thousand other fun details about the deeper sides of our lives?I hadn’t manufactured it, “the spark” was alive and well all night.” Or, use humor when he asks you to dinner and say,“Oh you want to take me on a date? ” Your confidence and clarity will be cute and his reaction will tell you a lot. Mean your kisses: Be careful with the connections you make with your body.Don’t be too serious too fast: I think this is often why guys keep things ambiguous, they’re afraid you’re going to go buy some bridal magazines on the way home and start naming your kids. Keep it classy and avoid just “hooking up” with a man.