The line between friends and dating
I'd go on dates with other men and find myself thinking about him, and once I joked that we should get together.I suppose I was testing the water to judge his reaction.'I had no idea that Sophie's feelings for me had changed,' he recalls.'After a few months of first meeting her I realised I was attracted to her, and as time went by my feelings grew a lot stronger.
In fact, it's so subtle they don't even notice it's happening until the moment a kindly hug becomes loaded with intention.
I'm not the sort of bloke who takes the lead, so I sat back while she went on various dates with other men.
Secretly I hoped there might be a future for us, so when she proposed I couldn't have been happier – or more gobsmacked.' In her book, Things I Wish My Mother Had Told Me, Lucia van der Post writes: 'All I know is that love comes out of the blue, sometimes when you least expect it, and that the key is not necessarily to go looking for it but to keep your heart and mind open to a wider horizon.' Yet, where friendship is concerned, the trigger that instigates a full swing into commitment is complex. Perhaps Sophie had tired of flitting through relationships and wanted someone more dependable?
After all, if trust is established, you'll be more likely to believe your relationship has a chance of longevity.
Richard Layard, a leading economist, writes in Happiness, Lessons From a New Science, 'As social beings, we want to trust each other.
The happiness in one country compared with another can be largely explained by six key factors…